Last week we talked about inheriting narratives. Today we’re going to talk about living them.
The journey is long. It’s a novel that we are the protagonist and author of. The kind of story we write is up to us… and some of us don’t see the pen in our hand-.. or we pretend not to.
But, storytelling is in our bones. Coded into our DNA which is a story in and of itself.
The thing that I believe separates humans from other animals is the depth of the tapestry we have woven in stories. Stories that allow us to work together as no creature born of this planet before us has. And we often don’t realize the power these collective stories hold over our ways of being, our minds, or even our lives.
We are not our stories. I think it’s important to recognize this. We can attach ourselves to stories and connect ourselves to stories… But to say that our story is who we are, is fundamentally inaccurate.
Some of us are so entrenched in our narratives, that we superimpose them onto the rest of our lives and the people in them.
“My first boyfriend was dishonest, so men are liars.”
“My last girlfriend was emotionally abusive, so I don’t emotionally open myself up to women.”
“My parents were fuck ups, people are incompetent and unreliable.”
When we feel invalidated and unseen in our lived realities, we can find ourselves feeling invalidated and unseen as people. We bring up the trauma telling whoever will listen-.. and sometimes those who refuse to listen. We walk ourselves down the same paths, refusing or unable to see the signs of danger or mark the path ourselves, occasionally even rejecting the warnings of those who have relevant experience. We force these experiences back into the forefront of our lives, seemingly until we ourselves can accept them as a reality, rather than the reality.
It is said that there is nothing new under the Sun. Maybe we can trust that there’s truth to that in our narratives... maybe we’ll have to see for ourselves.
I don’t believe we can have the answers for anyone but ourselves. And working to help other’s learn to find those answers within themselves is gift I want to give back to the world. Wherever you are in your journey, I hope we can all aspire to uncover the mysteries of our lives in a way that brings us closer to joy and takes us further suffering.
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